When it comes to Russian Dating Culture, it’s a bit of a mystery to men from other countries. It’s a shame because one of the most exciting aspects of moving to a new country is the prospect of finding a new love life there. However, it can be quite confusing to navigate if you have no idea of the customs, or only know a slight idea of what to expect.
What you expect to be polite, attractive or romantic in your culture may be perceived badly in the new culture you live in.
The same applies to every country in the world. Among the common questions is whether women in Russia enjoy the presence of foreigners or even consider dating them. Before you decide to look for a Russian girlfriend, it is important to know about the dating culture as well as knowing how to access popular Russian sites.
Do not let this scare you off though, because there is no such thing as ‘fixed rules’ regarding dating in the country. Understanding the culture and basic etiquette will help you go a long way towards understanding the Russian dating culture.
There are many websites that can help with this and travelers are well advised to seek out information on Russian women before coming to Russia. You can read up on culture tips, dating tips or even look up specialized websites that take you from dating to marriage with Russian women.
The dating scene in Russia
Similar to other cultures, it is not strange to meet a person through work circles or social networks, such as coffee shops or bars.
If it is a problem meeting people in person, then online dating is also an option, especially if you can speak Russian or go to areas and gatherings that have a considerable number of expats.
The culture is always a traditional or old-fashioned one when you go on dates. These include men behaving in a chivalrous manner that charms women.
When you are going on a date with someone, it is expected that you should dress in a formal manner – so wear trousers and a jacket when you go out on a date, while the woman is expected to wear a dress.
The first meeting involves shaking hands with an acquaintance while making eye contact, bringing a bouquet of flowers (in odd numbers) and maintaining a highly courteous attitude.
Always maintain a warm persona when interacting with your date and the people close to them, because the culture is more collective compared to other countries.
What makes Russian dating culture different from that of other countries?
The country might look like a liberal nation because of how obsessed girls usually are about their looks and clothes, but the dating culture is very conservative. It is also important to note that many lasting and credible relationships use the strong foundation of the friendship between a man and woman.
When you meet a person, it is expected that you will be friends with them first for a period of at least three months before you start to date them and become intimate.
On the other hand, dating in western countries, especially in the United States, the idea of relationships and dating carries a different mentality.
It can be very surprising to start dating a person from the day or week after you have met them, just because of ‘chemistry’ between the individuals, but it is a common thing in western dating culture. Once an American sees you as a good match, they jump right in and do not hesitate to ask you out.
In addition, what makes it different from Russian dating culture is the idea of ‘hookups’, when someone is not looking for a serious relationship. For Russians, the thought of encouraging casual sexual encounters is not there, and a person will not have the thought of looking for options and instead settle for the person that is available.
This also makes Russian culture think about getting married early in life, compared to western culture that only encourages marriage later on – such as when you are past the age of 26.
Russian men tend to be very chivalrous, and they will do special acts of service for the woman that has caught their attention. For instance, opening doors for them, buying small and big romantic gifts, getting those flowers, and carrying their luggage. In fact, a Russian man never allows a girl to carry objects larger than tiny purses, and will always foot the bills at the restaurant.
It is compulsory to get flowers for a girl, but you need to make sure that they are an odd number – flowers that are in even numbers tend to be for the purpose of funerals. In addition, the most appreciated of flowers are long stem ones, even though they tend to be more expensive. You can choose roses (especially red ones, as they are considered romantic), tulips (spring), romantic field flowers, or irises.
Girls are never expected to participate in the date, unlike in other cultures that may expect the woman to play a role. The man is supposed to plan the whole thing and surprise his girl, while she will take the time to make herself look as beautiful as possible. You should note that it is not for the intention of extorting money from you, but because it is the culture there.
What are some things you need to keep in mind?
Maintain high levels of respect
Regardless of the situation you are in, it is very important to maintain a high level of respect, especially with someone from other cultures. It is important to know and maintain the cultural traditions of the lady, and maintain the habit of formal first meetings.
This is in particular note to an American seeking to date in Russia, especially because they are very friendly to people they do not know, and this is seen as rude.
Do not question motives
Once you begin to ask a Russian lady about her motives, she feels insulted because you do not trust her in her sincerity. It is important to maintain a sense of tact when you want to find out more, and also ensure your own motives are true.
The idea of going on a date in sneakers, a t-shirt and jeans will not cut it, especially when you are trying to make a good first impression. You should also make an effort to get her gifts and flowers to impress her.
It may seem intimidating to date someone from Russia, but even the effort to know a little knowledge will go a long way.